Starting week three of being unemployed.
I didn't know what to do with myself today. I've applied for dozens of jobs, and I'm sure a fitting position will open for me soon. But it was weird. I couldn't relax, or do things that I wanted to do, because I felt like I needed to get a job. But a job isn't something you can just reach out and grab. You have to wait for it. I have a hard time waiting.
I felt like a waste of space.
Then I read this Thomas Jefferson quote (I keep a Jefferson quote blog):
"I have sometimes asked myself whether my country is the better for my having lived at all? I do not know that it is. I have been the instrument of doing the following things; but they would have been done by others; some of them, perhaps a little better."
"The Declaration of Independence."If it's ok for Jefferson to feel like a waste of space, then it's ok for me to have blah days as well
"I proposed the demolition of the church establishment, and the freedom of religion."
"The act prohibiting the importation of slaves."
A wise man told me that depression is a healthy, normal, and necessary time for reflection.
And I'd add to that: chocolate. Depression is a time for chocolate. The cause, and cure, of my current predicament.